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  • Writer's pictureMelanie Midegs

Conflict With My Writing Muse Cole Schafer

I’ve signed up to a 29 day writing challenge called Don’t Break The Chain with someone I consider to be a very cool, talented and masterful writer.

I’ve been following Cole for a while now, but be warned - he’s not for the faint hearted. In amongst his poetry he will make you laugh (or squirm) with his fowl mouth and witty mind.

You can still sign up to his challenge (we are only on day #4)… and no, I’m not an affiliate. And yes part of me is sharing for brownie points because the lesson he’s given me today I don’t want to do.


Ironically I’ve been tossing and turning all night with dreams of conflict. Stupid conflict. Each time I woke up I thought - what the hell was that? Far from restful, and I’ve put it down to having way too much on my mind.

Currently it’s like a speed car motorway.

And while my fingers glide over my keyboard after setting my writing timer for 45mins as directed, internally I’m in a world of conflict.

I’m sitting on a huge daybed on the balcony of my Penthouse Villa located on a cliff face above the ocean that I’ve run away to for the weekend. I needed to calm my mind. Watching a stunning sunrise from the corner of my eye as the clock ticks closer to 6am, I can even hear a huge cruise liner horn bellowing softy in the distance.


There is also a couple downstairs who want to watch the sunrise… but they don’t believe in silence. The woman just keeps on talking. All I want to do is get a bucket of water, stick my head over the side of my balcony and say ‘whoops!..’.

Maybe that’s why there’s so much conflict in the world.

There isn't enough silence.

When Cole’s email dropped in my inbox around 4am requesting to write about conflict, my mind instantly went to every lover, family member and friend I’ve had a blow up with. I don’t really want to write about those… it’s been enough already since 1am with all these vivid dreams stirring me.

The first dream was about me leaving Bali. I was required to have my hands tied while I handed over my passport (don’t forget it’s a dream people, a dream!), and the second I was living with my whole family in one house and I pretty much cracked the shits because I had no space, there was confusion everywhere, and no one was sharing any information. Somehow I also managed to emerge my laptop in the ocean tide that was creeping in.

Again, remember it was just a dream.

These dreams are much more reflective of my current state of mind rather than the people I love.

Yesterday, in real life, I reflected on why I love this writing challenge so much.

It’s because it’s the one thing in my world right now that is actually telling me what to do (a nice breather from me having think about my own strategies and guiding others), and I get to practice my writing.

Such a precious hour of time and space to commit to me.

I’ve never jumped out of bed so easily in the wee hours of the morning to dive straight into writing. It’s a breeze and the words appear for the most part quite easily. I’m surprised.

But Cole: Conflict? Really?

Today of all days? (now the couple downstairs are moving furniture… can she not just sit still for 2mins?!)

So I’m going to write about my conflict with Cole and his choice of lesson.

… my fingers all of a sudden have stopped writing.

I think I may have just said my piece.

This is how I imagine Cole would respond:

He would be in one of three places… given that it’s Saturday night in New York, he’s either out at a restaurant with a drink in his hand (a Moscow Mule I believe). With his girl in loved-up bliss. Or wrestling his bulldog named June.

He’d look up from what ever scenario and say:

Mel, first of all - how on earth can you be complaining while you sit there with the ocean at your feet, the sun rising out of the horizon while writing on a daybed on the balcony of your private Penthouse Villa?… do you hear yourself? Get a grip.

Do you remember the story I shared about how I was working my day job ripping up filthy old carpet from apartment floors while learning how to write? It was disgusting. I didn’t get to where I am today without doing the work - there was plenty I didn’t want to do.

Second. All good writers are good because they can swing their perspective around from any point of view. Not only your own - you know this because you have bought two other writing courses from me. The last three pieces you’ve written in this challenge - they have all been from your perspective.

Have you noticed that?

If you never put yourself and your writing in the perspective of someone else, your writing will be beige and your audience will get bored because everything is about you. They don’t give a shit about you - well they do, but you know what I mean - deep down they only care about themselves. I know you love writing, but right now I’m pretty sure your writing needs to sell… it drives me up the wall because it’s the craft that enables the sell. Trust what I’m teaching you. It will help you.

Third. Common girl. I know you are good at writing, but I also know you want to be better than this. When you signed up you shared with me the goals you have. They are big fucking goals.

You can make it real… but sometimes you’re gonna have to dig deep, suck it up and do things you don’t want to. You think Hemingway and Fitzgerald only wrote what they wanted? Hell no. They had critics not only commenting on their writing, but their dicks! Hahaha… sorry, I still think that story is hilarious - but I can guarantee you it kept them on their game. Mastery doesn’t just turn up, you’ve got to practice no matter how big or small you are in the world.


Stop complaining about your sleepless night, the couple downstairs and start writing… you’ll thank me when the sun’s up. Now where the hell is my {drink} {girl} {bulldog}.

Me: Sun’s up. ☺️

Thank you Cole.


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Psychosomatic Therapist & EQ Business Specialist, Melanie Midegs has a gift for understand who you are, just by looking at your face. Her mission in life is to transmute the mundane and confused into a world of endless possibilities.

Melanie uses her therapeutic training, wisdom and experience to assist Entrepreneurs & Corporate Executives to PIVOT when they find themselves at cross-roads, by teaching them emotional intelligence, how to create stronger boundaries and remembering who they really are.

Her creativity will blow your mind, as she will help to propel your vision into reality and stand out from the crowd in an crowded market place. Follow Melanie on Telegram



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